1. When you are sad - I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
2. When you are blue - I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile - I will know you finally got laid.
4. When you are scared - I will rag you about it every chance I get.
5. When you are worried - I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whining.
6. When you are confused - I will use small words.
7. When you are sick - Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I sure don't want what you have. And you know I was sicker than you when I had that.
8. When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.
This is my oath... I pledge it till the end. Why? You may ask. Because you are my friend!
Send this to 10 of your best friends and then get depressed because you can only think of two and only one of them is speaking to you.
Remember: A good friend will help you move. A really good friend will
help you move a body! Let me know if I need to bring a shovel!